BioShock Review -- Late Is The New Early

BioShock could be one of the classiest games I have ever played, but I'm still unsure of what the future holds for the franchise.
This past Halloween I decided to invest in a bottle of blended wine and a game that had mounds of dust collected upon it, BioShock. I had always wanted to play it and had it not for broad plot points being spoiled and over-hyped fanboys echoing the zeitgeist, I would have taken on this epic much sooner. Be that as it may, this is my tale and it has taken me almost two weeks to formulate some form of a coherent opinion. I really liked BioShock [add me to the list]. From the Ayn Rand references to the allusions of governments past and present, BioShock is one of few games I’ve played where I finally understood the need for this current generation of consoles. The experience(s) found in BioShock instill a benchmark that is rarely pushed. A game that points out the foibles of man may have unintentionally pointed out the missteps of its own genre.

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Quantum Theory Review -- This Game Hates You

Gun fists, tribal tattooed scars and be-jugged armor -- what went wrong with Quantum Theory?
I remember seeing Dave Chappelle on James Lipton’s “Inside The Actor’s Studio” and I remember something he said about learning about how comedy works. “I’d go on weekends to see how jokes worked and how people reacted, then I’d go on Tuesday nights to see what's wrong with these people [comedians].” Chappelle said. Quantum Theory is a game I’d liken to a comedian bombing on a Tuesday night. There were plenty of warnings prior to me playing Quantum Theory as to what kind of bland hell I’d nominated my week to. The trailers shown at trade shows were a sad joke muttered on plenty of game industry podcasts. Tecmo Koei’s Quantum Theory is a game that poorly steals from Gears of War and lends credence to many fears for the direction of Japanese game design. But hey, at least a great drinking game came from it.

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Commercial Break: Creepy Mario Is Creepy

Mario As Terribly Drawn Deviant Art

I don't know what possesses me to do these little photochops when I get off of work, but here we are. The at1up guys are having a little Creepy Mario fun. You should go check it out here.

I got two more after the jump.

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Commerical Break: Circle Kingz 2010 -- Flo Mo vs. SKMZ Final Battle

How about that DJ? Damn those songs were perfect for a final battle! Props to Flo Mo Crew and Skill Methodz Crew. Two battle-tested crews doing what they do best!

via TEKNYC's Blog

Are You The Character Or Are You God?

When consuming any media, our brains decide how much of our personality is invested. In games, chances are you are either the master or a slave to the narrative.
I’ve been watching how I play games as of late. Like a lot of you I have a 9-to-5 job and personally, nothing makes a better pixellated punching bag than a soon to be sniped skull in a round of Bad Company 2 or Team Fortress 2 multiplayer mayhem. This week I decided to buck that trend and play BioShock for the first time. Saving the review of the game for a later date, I’m noticing a stark difference in how I’ve consciously decided to play the game. Not only this, but the role I’ve decided to play in games differs from RPGs, RTSs and so forth. With this small revelation, I look at other media I consume and how it effects me. I look at the quality of games and debate whether I’m making the game fun or otherwise. Maybe you’ve noticed something strange in how you play games as well?

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Vote No On Outsourced

Come November, vote no on crap television!

This week is the final week for us American’s to step into a voting booth and vote on the issues we care about most. We’ve been inundated with junk mail and ads every other commercial break, but I want to take time out discuss a serious topic you should care about. Though November 2nd is the final day your vote will be counted, Thursday night on NBC [or NBC.com depending on how you watch the network] is a night where your vote will decide if public television will spiral further into Armageddon. People, when you sit down and you see a little television show starring a ‘stock white 30-something bro’ educating an office setting of naive New Delhians, I want you to think about your future and how terrible Outsourced is.

Outsourced’s only positive contribution to society is that its giving the talented Dietrich Bader work for the next year. This is where you come in. If you see a commercial, credits or anything affiliated with the show, click that s**t off! There are two jokes in Outsourced. One relies on this supposed culture clash between this American white man making fun of the naivete of Indian culture while showing them the foreign and strange ways of Americans [see also: The Balloween episode].  The second joke is far too rote. Don’t Indian people who speak English sound hilarious? Heck, there’s a character named Manmeat on the show, so how could that not be funny? Making fun of how Indian people talk and how strange their very Indian names sound was about as funny when I heard it the first hundred times on The Simpsons. And with all due respect, The Simpsons did it better.

So, my fellow Americans, you have a choice. You can contribute to the longest, unfunny Apu joke running on NBC. Or you could make a stand, right here and right now. Tell your friends who watch Outsourced, that doing so kills Jesus or whatever diety they worship. If they are atheist, tell them Outsourced is funded by all religions and in someway contributes to the anti-atheist movement [there is one right?]. I’ve watched NBC air such gems as the reboot of both Knight Rider and American Gladiators. Both equally offensive by the their own right and still managed to be somewhat entertaining [taste did not apply]. However, Outsourced is the Alamo in regards to what you [the viewer] will tolerate. It is a show that spits in your face while asking you to tune in each Thursday for the same joke. So this Thursday, vote no on Outsourced and in doing so, you’re voting yes for freedom.

Thank you for your time,
This message is brought to you by the letter I and paid for by The Brog Association for Brogging.

Justifying Your Purchase

How many of us buy with the hopes of a long future with our toys, only to be stuck holding the Super Scope 6? [Sorry, the Nintendo Scope 6 for our foreign readers]

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Commercial Break: I Missed IBE Too! Damn!

I know trailers paint just about anything in a positive light. Especially bboy trailers. You don't see the hassle it is to get from home to another country. You don't see how cold or how hot said country and/or the city the event is in. And you damn sure don't see how much money these dancers spend in order to make it out to an event such as this one.

This hits me two fold. I've always wanted to go to IBE, but I've always wanted to photograph the events as well. Well...at least this trailer is well cut, functions as a dope consolation prize.

Commercial Break: Paper Parkour

And I don't even dig Parkour!

Let Me In: Review -- A Remake Worth Your Time

Starring Chloe Moretz and Kodi Smit-McPhee, Let Me In is a tale of two children and their love of the Rubix cube.

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