Commercial Break: I Found Some Animal Stuff On The Internet [Work Safe]

So it's been a week since I've posted. I've been holding out on ya Internet. Don't fret, it's all part of my plan of making the times I do post that much more special, and mildly confusing. Let's be honest, that last post was a bit heavy.

Today's topic: Animals are weird to me. I'm pretty sure if I was in the jungle with 99.9 percent of any animal, I'd managed to end up dead and partially eaten.

I say partially, in the case of an animal that just wants to kill me and not devour my [assumed] delicious hind quarters.

Below you'll find more inspiring images from our animal friends, that will not only brighten your day, but hopefully encourage you to make the most of it. Why? Dude there's a hawk eating out of some Nepalese guy's hand. Now quit reading and get to watchin'! 

Okay, just this once, it's okay to use the term: "I'm goin' hard."

When people ask me, "Isaiah, why are you so anti-pet?" It's because pets cost money. Ask yourself, when was the last time you viewed your pet as an equal? Seriously. When's the last time your gold fish got up and cleaned the kitchen while you were away? Did your cat pay your taxes this year? No. When's the last time your dog stood with you on the front line of your Grecian riot? Oh...wait. Well, here's hoping more animals have access to youtube. Get inspired you mangy stench-bags.

For more about Parahawking, follow this link clearly labeled Parahawking.

You know when I started this particular Commercial Break I wasn't expecting it to be as animal-centric as it is, but here we are. Be sure to treat your animals kindly. This isn't a plug to become vegetarian. Kill that noise. It's an encouraging word from an omnivore that feels conflicted when seeing animals mistreated and/or neglected. 

I just wish that some of them didn't taste so damn delicious.

Oh my god how'd this get here?